The Rainbow Conspiracy

The Forces of Gay are steamrolling the rights of family values loving Christians again. This is hot off the press from my favorite Christian news source Agape Press:

The National Parents and Teachers Association (PTA) hosted a workshop in June that stressed the need to incorporate more "gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender" (GLBT) issues in public school policies and curricula. Meanwhile, a group that presents a message of hope for homosexuals and ex-homosexuals was refused space for their own display.

I know what you’re thinking. Who is this mysterious “group” that boldly bears the torch of “hope” into the dark recesses of homosexuality? It’s none other than PFOX, Parents and Friends of Ex-Gays and Gays. Yes, it seems that Jesus died for our sins and our sexuality, making redemption possible on both fronts. Don’t believe it? Well, the proof is in the formerly gay pudding. Just ask one of PFOX’s ex-gay friends.

Why would a wholesome organization like the PTA go so unabashedly gay? Agape’s own version of Deep Throat has a theory.

One delegate from Columbus -- a public school teacher who wished to remain anonymous for fear of retribution from PTA leaders -- contended that the exclusion of PFOX was because the PTA favors the presence of homosexual activist groups in public schools.

"I just believe that it's a political agenda," she said, "and whoever made the decision to deny [exhibit space to PFOX] is connected to the gay community in some way. Therefore they made a decision to shut out this group."

This stinks of conspiracy at the highest levels. Luckily, we’ve got a crack team of reporters ready to blow the whole thing wide open.

--Matthew McCoy